Small steps, they say

The most weird way to learn your own pace

I often hear this gentle advice: “Take small steps. It’s okay to move slowly. It’s even very good!” So I started wondering—is it really so? Like, is it truly so good? Or maybe it’s not for everyone? Perhaps it just me still clinging to the all-or-nothing formula?

But if there’s one thing I am willing to do in small steps, it’s returning to life.

You know how it happens — after a big project, a brutal deadline, or even after an achievement.

The adrenaline and cortisol fade; the goal you poured your whole self into expires; sometimes it feels like it was all for nothing. And all that’s left is this quiet task: returning to the normal flow of life.

The first TAAD took place just over a month ago.

For about two weeks after, I was genuinely stunned by the concept of weekends.

It took even longer to remember that I have a kitchen — and that there’s a great little market around the corner, right in the middle of Brussels sprouts season, which I love cooking and eating, but had somehow forgotten altogether.

I love cooking and setting a table. My set habitat grounds me.

Then I remembered that walks with Matteo could be longer than fifteen minutes — and could actually feel good.

It is the curliest creature in the land of curlies

That there are books I love to read. Boxing, running, moving my body — all magnificent, all things I’d somehow abandoned without even noticing.

My ultimate list for an upcoming month

Dates, concerts, museums, restaurants, conversations — it turns out, the outside world isn’t just a backdrop for your little bubble when you’re living for one single goal.

There were Purim, my birthday, several dates, a couple of private concerts and even a trip to Milan!

It’s almost surreal that just two months of total concentration forced me to forget how much I love to write. In many ways, this newsletter was my quiet way of trying to take those small steps everyone says are so important. Nevertheless, I started with a big commitment and religiously stuck to my promise, then made a couple of pivots and slowed down a bit, but kept moving… and then decided to redo everything. That’s when it hit me — these were never small steps. I simply hadn’t learned that pace. You’ve received just two dispatches under this new name with a quickly assembled logo in Canva. It was a nighttime compromise. The compromise lasted for two letters; after that, I just couldn’t even look at it.

So, naturally, I didn’t write a single word for two months, broke yet another grand promise (mostly to myself, of course), and missed out on the exquisite kind of joy I’m feeling right now — sitting here, finally, typing out all these letters like nothing ever happened.”

A few weeks ago, I finally pulled myself together and asked the incredibly talented Jane to help me with the design (either AI still can’t solve taste dilemmas — or I’m just writing the wrong prompts). The result of her great job is you are seeing right now, that also represents me entering my green era.

So yes — one small step took me two whole months. But now I’m learning from own mistakes and promising only this: to stop pressuring myself and to enjoy every second of doing what I truly, deeply love.

Meanwhile, I finished just released season of You (very good one), enjoying new episode of Your Friends & Neighbors (so far so good) and my big return to reading started with Wellness by Nathan Hill.

I’m so glad be back! And we’ll talk soon!

Yours,
Miri